Ginger

I never saw it coming, but then neither did Veggie. With the help of his mom, Candy Apple. and his dad, Fruity, I managed to restrain him long enough to keep him from lopping off his own head with a chain saw. It didn't help any that his botanist was referring him to a tree surgeon, to perform surgery. Veggie was dead set against modern medicine, especially surgery. He said, "I'd rather drink Roundup®!" and I've no doubt he meant it. How he got that little ® and the bold type to come flying out of his mouth I've yet to figure out all these years later.

"I'd rather be compost," Veggie shouted, "than let some half-wit, spinach for brains, tree surgeon whack me off!" Thank goodness Veggie's vision finally returned on its own after several weeks of total blindness.

None of the events that had taken place thus far had done much to change Veggie's outlook. He was tired of losing, tired of fighting, and tired of those yapping P-E-T-S whose shrill barks were always cutting away at his own bark. There was little doubt Veggie was tired of living, and was on the verge of giving up. I wondered if he wasn't dying anyway as his leaves were beginning to wilt and no amount of watering seemed to help. There was no doubt what happened next would sustain him for a while longer...

Ginger

Oh Ginger, how she lured him in,

her fragrance warm and sweet.

Was when ol' Veggie spied her,

she knocked him off his feet.

He'd never get enough of her

was Veggie's big concern,

but when he pulled her to his lips,

his lips began to burn!

"Oh my! Has the mighty vegetable stalker succumb to the spell of a woman? Could it be ol' Veggie has simply been seduced by a stigma? And what sort of woman is this Ginger who's hot and sweet at the same time? Will this showy flower cause Veggie to wise up or will his root get buried at last? Stay tuned to find out what happens next?"

 VegetableStalker.com is brought to you in part by Wackemall Mining, Manufacturing & Farming... Proud sponsors of the Vegetable Stalker. 

There was no doubt in the world that Veggie Head Stalker was in love with Miss. Ginger. The problem was that all of us who loved Veggie could see that Ginger wasn't right for him. Veggie needed someone with more on her bush than a sweet fragrance and big petals. Everyone knew it wouldn't work out. Everyone but Veggie, that is. Ginger was about to become Veggie's biggest nightmare ever, and there was nothing anyone could do to stop it. Or was there...

Cherries...

A cherry had eluded him

since he was a young sprig,

so the Vegetable Stalker set out

to embark on a new gig.

It seems that he had found a place

where cherries are a plenty,

but little did he realize

fifteen will get you twenty...

"Oh la, la! Veggie's hard head is in a pickle now. That's what happens when you let the little head do the thinking. Who would have thought ol' Veggie still had it in him? How do you think the Rebel Poet will get him out of this mess? Do you think he might get time off for good behavior? Will this be the end of the Adventurers of the Vegetable Stalker? Tune in to Up In Smoke to find out."

You know, all along I had thought I sensed animosity coming from the media personalities. By this time I was sure of it. Veggie was their bread and butter and yet they seemed to want him to fail.